20 years ago today...

Old 07-17-2013, 01:05 PM
  #11  
Tod74
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Congrats.....looks like you found a good one.
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Old 07-17-2013, 01:32 PM
  #12  
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Congrats Chris, I wish yall the best weekend!!!!
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Old 07-17-2013, 02:09 PM
  #13  
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Yer livin' the life many of us only dream of 'Bone !

DEFINITELY need to show the 'other' side what tire smoke smells like with that fancy grape water ! Bolt on a set of rags and burn 'em DOWN ! Tire dust all OVER the European sporty cars ! OR sucker them into a smokin 'em competition ! Either way, catch it all on video !

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Old 07-17-2013, 02:31 PM
  #14  
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My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.
I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have Sex?'
'No,' she answered.
I then said, 'Is that your final answer?'

... She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes..'
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

And that's when the fight started...

________________________________

I took my wife to a restaurant.

The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

"I'll have the rump steak, rare, please."
He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"
"Nah, she can order for herself."

And that's when the fight started.....

_____________________________

My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school
reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his
drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.

I asked her, "Do you know him?"
"Yes", she sighed,
"He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking
right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he
hasn't been sober since."

"My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?"

And then the fight started...

________________________________

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed.
But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat,
making beer.. Always something more important to me.

Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.
When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing
scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into
the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again
I handed her a toothbrush.

I said, "When you finish cutting the
grass, you might as well sweep the driveway."

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

_____________________________

My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, "What's on TV?"
I said, "Dust."

And then the fight started...

________________________________

Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the
boat up to the van and proceeded to back out into a torrential
downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather
would be bad all day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back;
now with a different anticipation,
and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."

My loving wife of 5 years replied, "And, can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"

And that's how the fight started...

_______________________________

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds."

I bought her a bathroom scale.

And then the fight started......

______________________________

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply
for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me

for my driver's License to verify my age. I looked in my pockets

and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that

I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.

She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped
your pants. You might have gotten disability too.'

And then the fight started...

________________________________

My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.

She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,
"I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you
to pay me a compliment.'

I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."

And then the fight started........

________________________________
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Old 07-17-2013, 02:44 PM
  #15  
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Originally Posted by bowtie4542001
Congrats Chris, I wish yall the best weekend!!!!
Thanks Chris!

Where have you been????
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Old 07-17-2013, 03:34 PM
  #16  
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Well done Harb!!! The 3 of you: God, your wife & you makes your marriage unbreakable. She & God saved your butt from the inevitable 3 alternatives: "Jails, Institutions & Death". A good wife & GRIM DETERMINATION will pull a man from drugs & the destruction. Few will make it as you unfortunately know. We both have that victory.... how sweet it is too. "One day at a time".... that is how we win & enjoy this life with all the pitfalls. You guys have the magic secret... you guys are like kids. Keep doing what you guys do. Tell her congrats from Riley & I.
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Old 07-17-2013, 04:31 PM
  #17  
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Congrats Chris, happy for you guys. Sounds like you guys are good for each other. Enjoy this weekend.
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Old 07-18-2013, 03:19 AM
  #18  
bowtie4542001
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Originally Posted by Harbone
Originally Posted by bowtie4542001
Congrats Chris, I wish yall the best weekend!!!!
Thanks Chris!

Where have you been????
I do not want to rain on your post , I have been going thru some difficult times the last year or so. My wife and I are in the process of going thru a divorce now. We had been married since Aug of 91. But I see the light at the end of the tunnel. I am with the one I should have married from the start. I went thru a depression stage and she has been a God send. It's amazing what a womens love can do for you. I have been out of racing for a while cause of finacial reasons but hopefully soon, I will be able to get back into it. My divorce should be final in the next few months and I can get on with my life and being happy again. I have really missed everyone on RJ.
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Old 07-18-2013, 05:39 AM
  #19  
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You arent raining on anything buddy, its good to hear from you and I am glad to hear you are getting back on your feet!
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Old 07-18-2013, 09:14 PM
  #20  
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Originally Posted by Harbone
You arent raining on anything buddy, its good to hear from you and I am glad to hear you are getting back on your feet!
X2.

Harbone you should give her something to remind her of when it all started 20+ years ago. Women like to remember things that happened a long time ago. Good or bad! lol . Seriously, women really do like to be reminded of how it all started.

I could write a book on here of what not to do if you ever need me too. It's worked flawlessly for me so far :lol:
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