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Thread: Merry Christmas

  1. #1
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE mopar1968's Avatar
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    Merry Christmas

    I haven't done this in a few year's :!:


    A little Humor;

    Mopar Night Before Christmas classic

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    'Twas the night before Christmas and out on the streets,
    Only Mopars were winning against Fords and "Heartbeats."

    The stop lights were hung over the streets with care,
    Getting ready to change for those drivers who dare.

    The children were nestled all snug in there beds,
    While visions of Hot Wheels danced in their heads.

    My wife was on the phone and I in the garage,
    Staring at my Miss Mopar collage.

    When out on the drive rolled up such a rumble,
    You knew for the owner it was hard to be humble.

    I recognized the sound but had to see for myself,
    I knew this was no blue oval elf.

    I was right, there it was, in it's plum crazy glow,
    A '71 426 'Cuda built for go.

    The black billboard split as the door opened wide,
    A large sack of parts was then tossed outside.

    A leg swung out with a tall black boot,
    Then there he stood in a red and white suit.

    It was Santa, St. Nick, in all of his glory,
    "But Santa, please tell me, just what is the story?"

    "Where is your sleigh, your eight tiny deer?"
    He said "I traded them in on 425 horses and a 4.10 gear!"

    "I test drove 'em all, every single musclecar,
    But none can beat 'Cheevies' like a Hemi Mopar!"

    "And son you've been good and learned all the tricks,
    So I'm swapping your small block for a 426!"

    Then he grabbed up his tools and went strait to the chore.
    The swap took one hour, no less and no more.

    This guy was good, but something wasn't right...
    Santa couldn't have learned to do that overnight.

    He torqued the last nut and then walked away,
    "With this," he said proudly, "you'll beat 'Cheevies' all day!"

    All at once it hit me, I recognized the voice,
    His skill with the tools, his words of choice.

    Once I figured it out, it was really no surprise,
    This was Larry Shepard in a Santa disguise.

    He collected up his tools and went back to his ride,
    Put his stuff in the trunk and hopped back inside.

    With a whine of the starter, the beast came alive,
    And with a shift to reverse, he backed out of my drive.

    With pistol grip in hand he shifted into first,
    And the 'Cuda jumped forward with a quick but smooth burst.

    I could see he was happy about what he had done,
    He had turned my car into major Mopar fun.

    But he had to be going, he had much to do,
    Lots of Hemis to be swapped in hours too few.

    And I heard him exclaim as he snatched second gear...
    "Have a smooth running Christmas and a Mopar New Year''
    __________________
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    Head's up the true drag race!!

  2. #2
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE TheYellaBrick's Avatar
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    TRUTH is HATE
    to those who
    HATE TRUTH

    God Bless our folks in uniform
    "We the People, have your backs"
    http://www.racingjunk.com/profile/279898

  3. #3
    Moderator RACING JUNKIE Harbone's Avatar
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    Excellent!!
    Chris

    As close to "Normal" as I can get...

  4. #4
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
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    Needs to be modernized....fiat has to fit in there somewhere. :shock:
    MIKE

  5. #5
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE mopar1968's Avatar
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    I will work on that for next year :!: :lol: :lol:
    Head's up the true drag race!!

  6. #6
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
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    "Santa knew the Cuda had lots of power, but the LS6 made it wilt like a flower. On Christmas day the 2 would meet; the although Santa predicted the imminent defeat. The LS left the line steering only w/ the front left tire, the ight proudly in the air & the back ones on fire. With the Cuda in toe and a car-length behind, the LS6 was of a faster kind. So Christmas would come & it would go, but the Mopar's would be remembered as a little too slow."

    That was for free. Its been awhile since I picked a Mopar or Ford fight. Merry Christmas dudes!!!!!!!!!
    "I would walk through hell on Sunday before I fear the enemy"

  7. #7
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE BEAST477's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scooterz
    "Santa knew the Cuda had lots of power, but the LS6 made it wilt like a flower. On Christmas day the 2 would meet; the although Santa predicted the imminent defeat. The LS left the line steering only w/ the front left tire, the ight proudly in the air & the back ones on fire. With the Cuda in toe and a car-length behind, the LS6 was of a faster kind. So Christmas would come & it would go, but the Mopar's would be remembered as a little too slow."

    That was for free. Its been awhile since I picked a Mopar or Ford fight. Merry Christmas dudes!!!!!!!!!

    :shock: I'll be quiet Mark, just this once. :lol: :lol: :lol:
    BEAST477






    Only a rich man can afford to use cheap parts.

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  8. #8
    Senior Member MASTER BUILDER
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    God no santas getting me a new cheby.... When i hear the word MOPAR me tummy gets a little queasy...Chevy settles my stomach..Kinda like when the LS6 came to town....Hemi guys, quietly drove away...lol

  9. #9
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE Swiley383's Avatar
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    Be careful picking on brand loyalty it can bite you. A coworker and myself learned that the hard way(expensive ). I was driving my 76 F100 daily at the time and he had a Chevy 1500 we were always going back and forth at each other's trucks. Who ever started it always had a problem within a few days. It wasn't that bad at first window crank would come off in your hand or a annoying squeak or rattle then it got to be head gaskets and transmissions so we called a truce. I am not really brand loyal I like everything it was just all in good fun but it sure got expensive.

  10. #10
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
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    So true!! Bad brand karma. Nahh, I was just seeing if anyone would give a tongue lashin' for that one. Truth is, I am a muscle car whore... brand is not so important. I would love to get a 68 Mustang FB & make that a new project. Outlaw: don't you have one of those that you picked up awhile ago?? Still got it??? Lets put the trailer on the Bus boys... I need to see if I talk Ken out of that car & bring her home.
    "I would walk through hell on Sunday before I fear the enemy"


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