A Fart Story
#1
Senior Member
EXPERT BUILDER
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: potash country
Posts: 262
A Fart Story
Ok....mid off season....sitting back,lounging,feet up remote in hand and getting fat...thinking about the race season coming up and sipping my favorite beverage and.....rrrrippppp......."Ahh boy that felt good"....but the wife said....you....(well it wasn't nice) :lol:
That reminded me of an e-mail that went around
A fart it is a pleasant thing,
It gives the belly ease,
It warms the bed in winter,
And suffocates the fleas.
A fart can be quiet,
A fart can be loud,
Some leave a powerful,
Poisonous cloud
A fart can be short,
Or a fart can be long,
Some farts have been known
To sound like a song....
A fart can create
A most curious medley,
A fart can be harmless,
Or silent , and deadly.
A fart might not smell,
While others are vile,
A fart may pass quickly,
Or linger a while......
A fart can occur
In a number of places,
And leave everyone there,
With strange looks on their faces.
From wide-open prairie,
To small elevators,
A fart will find all of
Us sooner or later.
But that farts are all bad,Is simply not true-
We must never forget....
Old farts,like you!
That reminded me of an e-mail that went around
A fart it is a pleasant thing,
It gives the belly ease,
It warms the bed in winter,
And suffocates the fleas.
A fart can be quiet,
A fart can be loud,
Some leave a powerful,
Poisonous cloud
A fart can be short,
Or a fart can be long,
Some farts have been known
To sound like a song....
A fart can create
A most curious medley,
A fart can be harmless,
Or silent , and deadly.
A fart might not smell,
While others are vile,
A fart may pass quickly,
Or linger a while......
A fart can occur
In a number of places,
And leave everyone there,
With strange looks on their faces.
From wide-open prairie,
To small elevators,
A fart will find all of
Us sooner or later.
But that farts are all bad,Is simply not true-
We must never forget....
Old farts,like you!
#2
Senior Member
RACING JUNKIE
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: san antonio, texas
Posts: 1,233
nofear, i love it, love it, love it, i like the ones that sing a song,
or when in a crowed room the ones that break the ice and linger
for a while to make sure all know a fart was blown, ha ha ha
tooooot toooooot sing a song :lol: :wink:
are when someone ask your opinion on something, blow one :wink:
or when in a crowed room the ones that break the ice and linger
for a while to make sure all know a fart was blown, ha ha ha
tooooot toooooot sing a song :lol: :wink:
are when someone ask your opinion on something, blow one :wink:
#3
Senior Member
RACING JUNKIE
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: EUGENE,OR.
Posts: 3,391
Nofear: that poem was a beautiful thing... I can appreciate a guy who settles down in his favorite chair & lets out a good ol' ripper... even around the family... and has a sence of pride only a man can understand.
I like to describe farts like motors... some are hot & lumpy; choppy in fact... having a measurement of duration too... like a cam. A good blow out is like having healthy compression... do you rate compression ratios for you farts too?? Some are like a 2 strokes... "small & zippy" like a YZ80. Some however with good compression are like the difference between a BB or SB... or a thumper 4 stroke fart. The pungent oder can also be realted to "rich" or "lean" or pump gas or race fuel... I could go on & on. Anyways, thanks for sharing one of my favorite past times brutha. Scooter
I like to describe farts like motors... some are hot & lumpy; choppy in fact... having a measurement of duration too... like a cam. A good blow out is like having healthy compression... do you rate compression ratios for you farts too?? Some are like a 2 strokes... "small & zippy" like a YZ80. Some however with good compression are like the difference between a BB or SB... or a thumper 4 stroke fart. The pungent oder can also be realted to "rich" or "lean" or pump gas or race fuel... I could go on & on. Anyways, thanks for sharing one of my favorite past times brutha. Scooter
#4
Senior Member
RACING JUNKIE
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: falkville al
Posts: 1,764
i was in a kroger checkout line standing in front of my cart when i felt the urge, i let go with a silent but lethal one when i was sure everyone ther got the powerful aroma, i lyelled out "damn debbie couldnt you wait" AND WALKED OUTSIDE TO SMOKE. my wife was standing behind the cart and she had to stay in line. by the way my wifes name is debbie.
#5
Senior Member
RACING JUNKIE
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: san antonio, texas
Posts: 1,233
good recovery outlaw, next time have her pull your finger
my grand kids always fall for that one, my grandson told his teacher
that he can make me fart by pulling my finger every time, when
i picked him up at school his friends wanted to pull my finger ha ha ha
my grand kids always fall for that one, my grandson told his teacher
that he can make me fart by pulling my finger every time, when
i picked him up at school his friends wanted to pull my finger ha ha ha