Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: A Fart Story

  1. #1
    Senior Member EXPERT BUILDER
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    potash country

    A Fart Story

    Ok....mid off season....sitting back,lounging,feet up remote in hand and getting fat...thinking about the race season coming up and sipping my favorite beverage and.....rrrrippppp......."Ahh boy that felt good"....but the wife it wasn't nice) :lol:
    That reminded me of an e-mail that went around

    A fart it is a pleasant thing,
    It gives the belly ease,
    It warms the bed in winter,
    And suffocates the fleas.
    A fart can be quiet,
    A fart can be loud,
    Some leave a powerful,
    Poisonous cloud
    A fart can be short,
    Or a fart can be long,
    Some farts have been known
    To sound like a song....
    A fart can create
    A most curious medley,
    A fart can be harmless,
    Or silent , and deadly.
    A fart might not smell,
    While others are vile,
    A fart may pass quickly,
    Or linger a while......
    A fart can occur
    In a number of places,
    And leave everyone there,
    With strange looks on their faces.
    From wide-open prairie,
    To small elevators,
    A fart will find all of
    Us sooner or later.
    But that farts are all bad,Is simply not true-
    We must never forget....
    Old farts,like you!
    If a 5 lb hammer can't fix it,it must be electrical
    Keep the shiney side up! 8)

  2. #2
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    san antonio, texas
    nofear, i love it, love it, love it, i like the ones that sing a song,
    or when in a crowed room the ones that break the ice and linger
    for a while to make sure all know a fart was blown, ha ha ha
    tooooot toooooot sing a song :lol: :wink:
    are when someone ask your opinion on something, blow one :wink:

  3. #3
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Nofear: that poem was a beautiful thing... I can appreciate a guy who settles down in his favorite chair & lets out a good ol' ripper... even around the family... and has a sence of pride only a man can understand.

    I like to describe farts like motors... some are hot & lumpy; choppy in fact... having a measurement of duration too... like a cam. A good blow out is like having healthy compression... do you rate compression ratios for you farts too?? Some are like a 2 strokes... "small & zippy" like a YZ80. Some however with good compression are like the difference between a BB or SB... or a thumper 4 stroke fart. The pungent oder can also be realted to "rich" or "lean" or pump gas or race fuel... I could go on & on. Anyways, thanks for sharing one of my favorite past times brutha. Scooter
    "I would walk through hell on Sunday before I fear the enemy"

  4. #4
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    falkville al
    i was in a kroger checkout line standing in front of my cart when i felt the urge, i let go with a silent but lethal one when i was sure everyone ther got the powerful aroma, i lyelled out "damn debbie couldnt you wait" AND WALKED OUTSIDE TO SMOKE. my wife was standing behind the cart and she had to stay in line. by the way my wifes name is debbie.

  5. #5
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    san antonio, texas
    good recovery outlaw, next time have her pull your finger
    my grand kids always fall for that one, my grandson told his teacher
    that he can make me fart by pulling my finger every time, when
    i picked him up at school his friends wanted to pull my finger ha ha ha

  6. #6
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE TheYellaBrick's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Emmett, Idaho
    "Clear on the right....clear on the left...the farting line is clear...FART AT WILL "
    to those who

    God Bless our folks in uniform
    "We the People, have your backs"

  7. #7
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE THERATTLER's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    My wife does that to me , she drops one and looks at me and walks off, I just fan my ass :lol: :lol:

  8. #8
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    san antonio, texas
    ~~~~~~~~~awwwwwwwhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, thats my fart story
    and im sticking to it :wink: pooooooooooot

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Copyright © 2005-2016 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands All Rights Reserved.

Designated trademarks and brands are the property of their respective owners. Use of this Web site constitutes acceptance of the
Terms of Use, Classifieds Disclaimer, Privacy Policy, and Cookie Policy