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Thread: Sent by a friend who swears it's true and first hand........

  1. #1
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE TheYellaBrick's Avatar
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    Sent by a friend who swears it's true and first hand........

    I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it
    up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it.


    The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that, since
    they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me
    when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the
    bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away), it should
    not be difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to
    calm it down) then hog tie it and transport it home.

    I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my rope. The cattle,
    having seen the roping thing before, stayed well back. They were not having
    any of it.

    After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up -- 3 of them. I picked out....a
    likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the feeder, and threw..my
    rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me. I wrapped the rope around
    my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good hold. The deer still just
    stood and stared at me, but you could tell it was mildly concerned about the
    whole rope situation. I took a step towards it...it took a step away. I put
    a little tension on the rope and then received an education.

    The first thing that I learned is that, while a deer may just stand there
    looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you
    start pulling on that rope.

    That deer EXPLODED.

    The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger
    than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I could fight down
    with a rope and with some dignity.

    A deer-- no chance.

    That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it
    and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started
    dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope
    was not nearly as good an idea as I had originally imagined.

    The only up side is that they do not have as much stamina as many other
    animals. A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick to
    jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few
    minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out
    of the big gash in my head. At that point, I had lost my taste for corn-fed
    venison. I just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope.

    I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would
    likely die slow and painfully somewhere. At the time, there was no love at
    all between me and that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and I would
    venture a guess that the feeling was mutual.

    Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots where I had cleverly
    arrested the deer's momentum by bracing my head against various large rocks
    as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to
    recognize that there was a small chance that I shared some tiny amount of
    responsibility for the situation we were in, so I didn't want the deer to
    have to suffer a slow death, so I managed to get it lined back up in between
    my truck and the feeder - a little trap I had set before hand...kind of like
    a squeeze chute.

    I got it to back in there and I started moving up so I could get my rope
    back.

    Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would have
    thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very surprised when...

    I reached up there to grab that r ope and the deer grabbed hold of my wrist.
    Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where they
    just bite you and then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head --almost
    like a pit bull. They bite HARD and it hurts.

    The proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw
    back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking instead. My method was
    ineffective. It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several
    minutes, but it was likely only several seconds.

    I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by
    now), tricked it.

    While I kept it busy tearing the tendons out of my right arm, I reached up
    with my left hand and pulled that rope loose. That was when I got my final
    lesson in deer behavior for the day.

    Deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their
    back feet and strike right about head and shoulder level, and their hooves
    are surprisingly sharp. I learned a long time ago that, when an animal --like
    a horse --strikes at you with their hooves and you can't get away easily, the
    best thing to do is try to make a loud noise and make an aggressive move
    towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you
    can escape.

    This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously, such trickery would not
    work. In the course of a millisecond, I devised a different strategy.

    I screamed like a woman and tried to turn and run.

    The reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse
    that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the
    back of the head. Deer may not be s o different from horses after all, besides
    being twice as strong and 3 times as evil, because the second I turned to
    run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down,

    Now, when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it does not immediately
    leave. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed. What they
    do instead is paw your back and jump up and down on you while you are laying
    there crying like a lit tle girl and covering your head. I finally managed to
    crawl under the truck and the deer went away.

    So now I know why when people go deer hunting they bring a rifle with a scope
    to sort of even the odds.


    All these events are true so help me God...
    TRUTH is HATE
    to those who
    HATE TRUTH

    God Bless our folks in uniform
    "We the People, have your backs"
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  2. #2
    Senior Member EXPERT BUILDER
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    Sorry. But that is funny, thanks for the good laugh. Hope your alright. :lol:

  3. #3
    Junior Member SHOW GUEST
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    OMG!!
    I have tears in my eyes and almost could not read this.I'm sorry if this really happened to you but its funny.

  4. #4
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE TheYellaBrick's Avatar
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    LOLOL No this is NOT first hand by ME. It was sent by a friend who swears it's true......some of my friends belong on the short bus with the rest of usn's :shock: :shock: :roll: :roll: ops: ops: ops:
    TRUTH is HATE
    to those who
    HATE TRUTH

    God Bless our folks in uniform
    "We the People, have your backs"
    http://www.racingjunk.com/profile/279898

  5. #5
    Senior Member DYNO OPERATOR
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    Quote Originally Posted by DrivingMissDD
    LOLOL No this is NOT first hand by ME. It was sent by a friend who swears it's true......some of my friends belong on the short bus with the rest of usn's :shock: :shock: :roll: :roll: ops: ops: ops:
    Being a full pollack, I have an entire family of relatives that could have been in your friend's situation. Problem is that they would have given it a second try to refine the beating from the deer, or so it would seem :lol: :lol: :lol:

  6. #6
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
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    Seen this 4-5 months ago .. true or not just funny :lol:
    David Lanning
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  7. #7
    And I thought I was a bad hunter....NOW I have suddenly appreciated BEER HUNTING!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

  8. #8
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE TheYellaBrick's Avatar
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    Is that bear - beer or bare hunting ? :shock:
    TRUTH is HATE
    to those who
    HATE TRUTH

    God Bless our folks in uniform
    "We the People, have your backs"
    http://www.racingjunk.com/profile/279898

  9. #9
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
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    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

  10. #10
    Senior Member EXPERT BUILDER
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    :shock: :shock: Mmmm...I always hunt deer with my riffle but I do have a cross bow I was going to try but after reading this maybe I'll just keep my distance as always :lol:
    If a 5 lb hammer can't fix it,it must be electrical
    Keep the shiney side up! 8)
    http://www.racingjunk.com/profile/85221


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