Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: Saturday's jokes

  1. #1
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    ID
    Posts
    1,125

    Saturday's jokes

    2 dumb fishermen decided to rent a boat on a lake for their favorite sport. After fishing for 4 hours at various places around the lake with no luck at all they decided to try one more spot before calling it quits, Suddenly things started to happen, and they caught their limit inside of twenty minutes. paul said, (Hey we should mark this spot, so next time we will know where to come,) Jim says good idea, and he took out a can of spray paint and made a large X on the floor of the boat....to mark the spot.... With that paul says, why did you do that, now anyone who rents this boat will know where to fish.




    Questions that have Confused humankind!!

    a.. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, \"I think I\'ll
    squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?\"

    a.. Who was the first person to say \"See that chicken there....I\'m gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it\'s butt.\"

    a.. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
    horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

    a.. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

    a.. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

    a.. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

    a.. If the professor on Gilligan\'s Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can\'t he fix a hole in a boat?

    a.. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don\'t point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

    a.. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They\'re both dogs!

    a.. What do you call male ballerinas?

    a.. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap,why
    didn\'t he just buy dinner?

    a.. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

    a.. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
    vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

    a.. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

    a.. Isn\'t Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?

    a.. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the
    same tune?

    a.. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

    a.. Why do they call it an asteroid when it\'s outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it\'s in your ass?

    a.. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog\'s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he can\'t wait to stick his head out the window into the wind?

    a.. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?



    Read the 10 to-do instructions and then scroll for the answer - NO CHEATING!

    1. Back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart.
    2. Form a loose grip.
    3. Keep your head down.
    4. Avoid a quick back swing.
    5. Stay out of the water.
    6. Try not to hit anyone.
    7. If you are taking too long, please let others go ahead of you.
    8. Don't stand directly in front of others.
    9. Quiet please... while others are preparing to go.
    10. Don't take extra strokes.
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    Very good. Now flush the urinal, go outside, and tee off!
    (From a sign posted at a local golf course restroom

  2. #2
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE mytmouz's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    Pelahatchie, MS
    Posts
    983
    :lol:
    If you think nobody cares, try missing a payment...

  3. #3

  4. #4
    Senior Member DYNO OPERATOR
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    558
    LOL, LOL.

  5. #5
    Member JUNIOR BUILDER
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    96
    One more for your list.

    Would Tennis elbow be worse than Tennis balls.
    The older I get the less i know for sure Dennis


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Copyright © 2005-2016 RacingJunk.com All Rights Reserved.

Designated trademarks and brands are the property of their respective owners. Use of this Web site constitutes acceptance of the RacingJunk.com
Terms of Use, Classifieds Disclaimer, Privacy Policy, and Cookie Policy