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Thread: Ad Translator

  1. #1
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Sep 2005

    Ad Translator

    You may find these helpful when buying...

    Needs Minor Work - Needs significant work.

    Needs Nothing - Except a tow truck.

    Easy Project Car - Completely disassembled, bring many boxes.

    Minor Rust - Don't sit down!

    Minor Rust - Major rust you can’t see.

    Low Mileage - Only 170,000.

    Convertible - After driving under truck.

    Runs Great - Too bad it doesn’t roll.

    Alarm - Wires are cut to sell stolen.

    Nice Stereo - To overcome exhaust noise.

    Needs Paint - To cover rust.

    New Paint - Beautifully covers rust.

    Fully Loaded - Seller is too.

    All Options - 8-track player.

    Only 59,000 Miles - Actually 359,000 miles.

    Rare Model - One of 500,000 made.

    Must Sell - Before the law finds seller.

    Must Sell - Need bail money.

    Summer Fun - Roof leaks in winter.

    Summer Fun - Won't make it to fall.

    Reliable - Don't leave the neighborhood.

    Daily Driver - 400 miles a day.

    Only Driven Sundays - Sunday is race day.

    Engine Rebuilt - Engine degreased to look it.

    Doesn’t Smoke - No oil to burn, or 90wt oil.

    Trans. Rebuilt - Fine sawdust used to make it quiet.

    4 Speed Gearbox - 5th gear is dead.

    Hurry, Won't Last - Neither will car.

    New Tires - Retreads years ago.

    Well Maintained - Oil changed every other leap year.

    Drives Like a Dream - Nightmare.

    Car Cover - To help keep out rats.

    Always Garaged - Embarrassed to leave it outside.

    Family Owned - Driven by 6 teenagers.

    Fully Restored - Nothing original.

    Smog Exempt - DMV doesn't think so.

    Tags Till Next Year - Stolen year sticker.

    Moving, Must Sell - Off to jail, need bail money.

    Must Sell - Before it blows up.

    Runs Fine - I was going to say "runs excellent" but I had a last minute attack of conscience.

    Needs Some Body Work - Was side-swiped by a Winnebago.

    Well Maintanied -I occasionally change the oil.

    Looks Like New - Just don't try to drive it anywhere.

    All Original - I never had anything fixed, adjusted, or replaced.

    Loaded With Options - Each one more troublesome than the last.

    Never Smoked In - Unfortunately, that's the best thing I can say about it.

    Project Car - I can't figure out how to finish it and I doubt you will either.

    Lots of Potential - To drive you insane.

    Needs Minor Repair - Doesn't run.

    Engine Quiet - Uses 90-weight oil

    Parts Car - Beyond repair.

    Rough Condition - Too bad to lie about.

    Immaculate - Recently washed.

    Concours - Recently waxed.

    Needs Minor Overhaul - Needs engine.

    Needs Major Overhaul - Phone the junkyard.

    Burns No Oil - It all leaks out.

    Rebuilt Engine - Cleaned the spark plugs.

    Drive It Anywhere - I live on a hill.

    Drive It Anywhere - Within 10 miles.

    Desireable Classic - No one wants it.

    Rare Classic - No one wanted it even when it was new.

    Stored 20 Years - In a farmer's field.

    Ran When Stored - Won't start.

    Never Apart - Bolts too rounded to loosen.

    Solid As A Rock - Rusted solid

    Restored With 0 Miles - Won't start.

    Restored With 2 Miles - Won't stay running.

    Older Restoration - First owner washed it.

    Good Investment - Can't be worth much less.

    No Time To Restore It - Can't obtain parts.

    95% Complete - Other 5% doesn't exist.

    Clean - Homeless dude at 5th and Main did the windows.

    Good Transportation - It's ugly as sin.

    Engine Blueprinted - I don't know what it means either.

    Exellent Gas Mileage - It's slow.

    Low Miles - The odometer was turned back.

    One Owner - Can't give it away.

    Sure to Appreciate - That's why I'm selling it.

    ..Or Best Offer - I'm guessing here.

    Faster Than A 'Vette - A Chevette.

    Other Interests Conflict - Spouse's ultimatum: "Either that #[email protected]&## thing goes or I do!" :shock:

  2. #2
    Administrator RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Engine is "fresh" = paint job
    There Is 1 Thing Better Than Cubic Inches,,,More Of Them

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Lowell, IN
    10 second ricer = 0 to 60 times not a quarter mile :lol:

  4. #4
    Senior Member MASTER BUILDER
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Faribault, Mn.
    :lol: :lol:
    You lift, lose.

  5. #5
    Senior Member MASTER BUILDER
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Indianapolis In
    You forgot A couple

    Car Cover= to keep Code enforcement away for public Eyesore

    Restored less than 100 miles on it = as far as it got before parts started falling off

    A pleasure to drive = When & if it ever starts

    Doesnt smoke = Put Synthetic oil in it so it doesnt get mistaken for A county bug sprayer
    If your not wearing A BOWTIE
    Your NOT properly dressed

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