Someone that can drink responsibly can never understand what it's like to be someone who can't. I make no excuses for the choices I made. It's been ten years and I still think about it daily. It will never go away, and I know that I can never again drink responsibly. After so many years sober it is easy to tell myself that I am better now, that I can have a beer if I want...but I cannot. All I can do is stay clean today, and then I will tackle tommoroww when it gets here.