speeding ticket
 

Subject: Caught: Clocked at 80 mph


A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, "Sir, I clocked you at 80 miles per hour."

The driver says, "Gee, officer, I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating."

Not looking up from her knitting in the passenger seat, the wife says, "Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car does NOT have cruise control."

As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can you please keep your mouth shut for once?"

The wife smiles demurely and says, "Dear, you should just be thankful your radar detector went off when it did."

As the officer makes out a second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit fitted in the car he had just pulled over, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Dammit, woman, can't you just keep your big mouth shut ???"

The officer frowns and says, "Hmmm, and I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's another automatic $75 fine."

The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but I took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back
pocket."

The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You NEVER wear your seat belt when you're driving."

And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and bellows at her, "WILL YOU PLEASE JUST SHUT THE HECK UP ???"

The officer looks over at the wife and asks, "Pardon me Ma'am, but does your husband always talk to you this way?"

I love this part............

"Only when he's been drinking."

:) :) :)