Lost my dad...

[Incognegro]

After a long battle with liver cancer from Agent Orange exposure in Vietnam, my dad has passed away on 1/19/2012 at 4:20 AM. It sounds creepy but I somehow knew he was going to die on that night, when I was leaving work I stopped to look at a picture of him and I hanging in my locker and I remember thinking that was a good picture of him cause it's the only one I have where he is not wearing a hat..That picture has been in my locker for 8 years and I never glanced at it twice until that night...Then when I got home and went to bed, I swear I felt a presence in my bedroom and remember thinking to myself, "my dad is going to die tonight and come visit us"...Sure enough I was awoken at 5:30 AM to the call I have been dreading, yet am relieved to get...His suffering is over and now I can remember him in his healthy days not his dying ones..

I find some comfort that his last days he was lying in bed and thought he was drag racing, and kept telling everyone to move so he could see the tree and was telling his wife to get gas for the car. He was also working the gas and brake with his feet and having conversations with his dead brother..I hope he at least didnt red light like he always did..



R.I.P. Dad...

[mopar1968]

Sorry to hear this! Lost my Dad in 1992 we raced together since i learned to drive!



Mark

[BEAST477]

Sorry for your loss.

[qtrmile2]

Very sorry for your loss. Sounds like you had a great Father. He has given you alot of great times to think about I'm sure.
God love him.

[Goomba]

Sorry for your loss.

[bjuice]

After a long battle with liver cancer from Agent Orange exposure in Vietnam, my dad has passed away on 1/19/2012 at 4:20 AM. It sounds creepy but I somehow knew he was going to die on that night, when I was leaving work I stopped to look at a picture of him and I hanging in my locker and I remember thinking that was a good picture of him cause it's the only one I have where he is not wearing a hat..That picture has been in my locker for 8 years and I never glanced at it twice until that night...Then when I got home and went to bed, I swear I felt a presence in my bedroom and remember thinking to myself, "my dad is going to die tonight and come visit us"...Sure enough I was awoken at 5:30 AM to the call I have been dreading, yet am relieved to get...His suffering is over and now I can remember him in his healthy days not his dying ones..

I find some comfort that his last days he was lying in bed and thought he was drag racing, and kept telling everyone to move so he could see the tree and was telling his wife to get gas for the car. He was also working the gas and brake with his feet and having conversations with his dead brother..I hope he at least didnt red light like he always did..



R.I.P. Dad...

Hey Brother and I call you my brother because I am also ex-lawenforcement. I am SO sorry for your loss and if there is anything I can do please do not hesitate to ask.

My wifes Father passed 1 year ago yesterday and he was a long time truck Driver and loved his profession. As he lay on his death bed in his final days he was Driving his Truck, I mean downshifting the whole 9 yards...So I have No doubt we go back to Our Happy days when its Our time.

Godspeed to your Father and may peace be with you and your family Julian

Bjuice ( Brian )

[MEMRACING62]

So sorry for your loss julian, R.I.P. :(

[curtisreed]

Very sorry for your loss.

Curtis

[TheYellaBrick]

Once a racer, always a racer. Now he's up yonder on the best racing team around. He'll be telling you all about all those fine greens he's cutting almost every round.
Live your life in dedication to his memory. God will Bless you.

[TS1955]

Sorry for your loss. We'll Prayer for comfort for you and your family. Be happy for him knowing he's not suffering any more and is in a better place.

TS1955

[Harbone]

Julian sorry for your loss. In the case of your father and Brians father inlaw, for some reason the word "godspeed" has true meaning

[cbtlr]

Sorry for your loss I feel your pain.I had something happen to me when my mother passed..The night this happened I would wake up crying for no apparent reason..Never have cried while sleeping ever.My wife asked what was wrong?I had no idea so I could not give her a answer..I was able to go back to sleep but woke again crying..I just said screw it I'm going to work early sense I can not sleep..
I get to work a hr later..Wife calls me you need to come home.I asked why and she would not say..I then said TELL ME whats wrong?She then informed my mother was found deceased in her home...I will never forget that night of tears.
Just sharing true experience.

[Incognegro]

My dad moved from NJ back to NC after he divorced my mom and I was 8 years old at the time, so we went through periods of lost communication and didnt see each other much. But in the past 5 years since he got sick we were really close, we spoke almost daily and we saw each other every year since..I just regret loosing so much time of not visiting him 3-4-5 times a year. Some how now that 8 hour drive to NC dont seem that long cause you cant drive to heaven..

We only got to drag race together 2 times, one time in 1995 in Peidmont when I had my 80 Corvette and one time in 2010 when he came up here to visit, and I cherish those times, but I wish we got to go to the track more often together.

When I got the call before Christmas that he was put in the VA hospital on Hospice care, I literally dropped everything I was doing and was on my way to NC within 20 minutes of getting the call. He kind of hid the fact from everyone that his cancer had gotten that bad.. In fact he never even told his 87 year old mother..In fact about 2 months before he went into hospice he bought an 88 Monte Carlo and started racing it, he seemed fine..Then he started throwing up blood, and told me he was going in the hospital for a "simple procedure", well that simple procedure was to bypass the artery going to his liver..He hid how serious it all was cause he didnt want to get me worried..In fact he didnt want his wife to tell me he was in hospice until after the holidays, but my cousin that I met once when I was 5 got my phone number form his phone and called me. Im glad she did cause I lost an uncle to cancer and I never got to see him in the hospital and I have felt that guilt for the past 2 years.

All my dad has been through in the past few years with the cancer, I never once saw him complain or feel sorry for himself or say "why me"..He had the most positive "oh well cant do nothing about it" attitude about it, I was amazed..If I can be half the man in life that he was in death, I will be proud.

Well I guess Im getting a slow 88 Monte Carlo :D Good think I kept the last motor my dad ever built and its sitting in my garage and will be in my possession till the day I die..

I will by flying in to NC on Monday, he is having a military honor funeral and being buried in the VA .

http://i221.photobucket.com/albums/dd73/mrcmotorsportsLLC/381487_273853656005354_100001421641566_809720_1481 256490_n.jpg
http://i221.photobucket.com/albums/dd73/mrcmotorsportsLLC/304093_248945445162842_100001421641566_747218_3026 84697_n.jpg

[DirkaDirka]

Sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.

I know what you mean by feeling like you wishing that you spent more time with him. I lost my grandmother who raised me for 16 years this past November. Ever since then I have felt the same way. every chance I had to see them I didnt.

[fast75vega]

sorry to hear bro..... death is a terrible thing but i guess its all part of life at the same time. they say for every death... there is another one born some where else at that very time ... makes you really stop and think :wink:

[spib]

very sorry to hear loss of your dad

[bixblk]

Sorry for your loss
I promise he is still with you watching over you,
Gods Speed
Jeff M

[TheRabbit]

Sorry for your loss.

[Incognegro]

I just got back from NC for the funeral. He was a Vietnam vet and the VA gave him a military honors funeral and he will be buried in the VA cemetery in Salsbury..It was a very hard day for me..They gave me the flag from his coffin that was a very emotional moment for me..When i was leaving today I drove by his house one last time and just sat at the top of the street and completely fell apart knowing I would never be there again and neither would he..Its starting to really sink in now..

http://i221.photobucket.com/albums/dd73/mrcmotorsportsLLC/337004_295113480546038_100001421641566_867740_1898 470863_o.jpg

http://i221.photobucket.com/albums/dd73/mrcmotorsportsLLC/194767_295113747212678_100001421641566_867741_7743 05475_o.jpg

http://i221.photobucket.com/albums/dd73/mrcmotorsportsLLC/304093_248945445162842_100001421641566_747218_3026 84697_n-1.jpg

[TheYellaBrick]

Rest in peace, Soldier......

-----------------------

[drewcrew]

To Julian and the others here that have been thru the loss of a parent all I can say is I'm sorry and you are in my prayers. I lost my Dad to cancer in October of 1970, two months after I got home from VietNam. He had three major surgeries starting the month after I left for VietNam. I didn't know anything about till maybe three weeks before I was scheduled to come home. He wouldn't let my Mom contact the Red Cross to get me home. He said since I volunteered for Nam he didn't want to mess up my plans. I have found the longer I live the smarter he was.

[Incognegro]

My dad was such a Chevy nut, we buried him in a Chevy T-shirt, Chevy Hat and Edlebrock autographed hat by Vic Edelbrock!!! Just like he was at the track!!

[TS1955]

Just remember you have a life time of memories in your heart. Take Care.

TS1955

[bcw49]

Sorry for the loss of yor dad, I also lost my dad, brother, and golden retriever to cancer, it's a terrible thing. God bless your father.

[Scooterz]

J3:

Cool guy!! I bet you are proud of him. Great pics too. Remember it is just bye for now. He is still there; just freed from his tired body. I bet he misses you too; but he is more alive that ever now. I hope there are hot rods up there... I bet there is... the tracks don't close down either. Keep your chin up & pray... your dad will get the message.

[TheRabbit]

J3:

Cool guy!! I bet you are proud of him. Great pics too. Remember it is just bye for now. He is still there; just freed from his tired body. I bet he misses you too; but he is more alive that ever now. I hope there are hot rods up there... I bet there is... the tracks don't close down either. Keep your chin up & pray... your dad will get the message.

Sorry guys, but I just wanted to repost this. As always Scooter, very thoughtful words when someone needs to hear them.

[zipper06]

My dad was such a Chevy nut, we buried him in a Chevy T-shirt, Chevy Hat and Edlebrock autographed hat by Vic Edelbrock!!! Just like he was at the track!!

Sorry to hear about your loss and the burial attire is way cool. I want to be buried in my SFI 20 suit, and if i don't ever get my Anglia finished that will be the next time it's used.

Zip.

[Scooterz]

J3:

Cool guy!! I bet you are proud of him. Great pics too. Remember it is just bye for now. He is still there; just freed from his tired body. I bet he misses you too; but he is more alive that ever now. I hope there are hot rods up there... I bet there is... the tracks don't close down either. Keep your chin up & pray... your dad will get the message.

Sorry guys, but I just wanted to repost this. As always Scooter, very thoughtful words when someone needs to hear them.

Well thanks Wabb. I don't ever want to minimize a persons passing like J3's dad for example; but I truly believe that J3's dad is paradise right now. I don't understand it any better than anyone else, but I believe it. He is in good hands.

[Incognegro]

I honestly hope he is...Even if there is nothing after death it cant be that bad, no one has ever came back.

[Scooterz]

LOL!!! No seriously... the only one that "came back" left again. :D :D

[TheYellaBrick]

And 'HE' "Will be back"

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[Scooterz]

Amen DD... amen.

[bad68backhalf]

Lost my father in march of 2011,i could never imagine the hurt i felt. The guy was my hero,he was in the korean war,philly police officer for 22 years,and bomb squad,(he built the bomb that blew up the MOVE compond in Philly). Trying to live with his loss,in sept 2011 i lost my baby boy. I cant even put into words the way i felt.I dont think time heals all wounds,will just take it day by day.

[Scooterz]

Bad68:

Just saw your post. Not even going to try to comprehend your loss. That is 2 really hard blows. Everything I say can be "easier said than done"... but answers are not in the bottom of bottles or ditching faith in God. I have seen friends kill themselves slowly for a lot LESS than you have gone through... yet you are still here. You have to think about what your baby boy would want you to do, what your father would tell you if they could speak to you right now. Honor your boy & your dad & wear your heart on your sleeve. After all, they want you to be happy & at peace. I don't think time heals wounds either. I believe that God will give you a peace about where they are right now. The fact you even were brave enough to tell us your loss is a good sign that you will make it through this. It would be too easy to go off the deep end... your boy & your dad don't want you to self destruct. The world can be really harsh... but we don't have to put our faith in it.... your boy is w/ his papa & they are fine right now. Believe it. Chin up & don't be a stranger. Scooter

[bad68backhalf]

Thank you ,you are right,i have 4 young kid's that i have to take care of,and they help get thru everyday.If i did not have them i dont know where i would be.