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Thread: Tickets

  1. #1
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE fla1976's Avatar
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    Tickets

    These are actual comments made by 16 Police Officers.


    The comments were taken off actual police car videos around the country:

    16 'You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just
    went through.'

    15 'Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll
    stretch after you wear them a while.'

    14 'If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth
    certificate a worthless document.'

    13 'If you run, you'll only go to jail tired.'

    12 'Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the
    speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you.'

    11 'You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can
    write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?'

    10 'Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think
    it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?'

    9 'Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that
    again or I'll give you another ticket. '

    8 'The answer to this last question will determine whether you are
    drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?'

    7 'Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go
    to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey
    poop.'

    6 'Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster
    oven.'

    5 'In God We Trust, all others we run through NCIC.'

    4 'How big were those 'two beers' you say you had?'

    3 'No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're
    allowed to write as many tickets as we can.'

    2 'I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of
    yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.'

    AND THE WINNER IS....

    1 'You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? Okay ma'am, you're
    right, we don't. Sign here.'

  2. #2
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE DirkaDirka's Avatar
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    I think #15, 11, & 7 or the best ones. :lol: :lol: :lol: :twisted:

    On another note....

    The wifey got pulled over one day by a state trooper and she made a comment about cops and donuts. The trooper cam eback with sorry we are not allowed to eat donuts no more. We had to change to bagels. :shock: :shock:
    Its all fun and games till someone loses a nut!

    http://www.racingjunk.com/profile/400466

  3. #3
    Member JUNIOR BUILDER
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    Cops Comments

    I'm an ex -cop and I once stopped a guy for 30 over in a school zone. First words out of his mouth were, "I've haven't had a ticket in over 20 years". I just looked at him and said,"Tomorrow morning you won't be able to say that sir", and preceded to write him up.

  4. #4
    Senior Member DYNO OPERATOR
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    Re: Cops Comments

    Quote Originally Posted by deward
    I'm an ex -cop and I once stopped a guy for 30 over in a school zone. First words out of his mouth were, "I've haven't had a ticket in over 20 years". I just looked at him and said,"Tomorrow morning you won't be able to say that sir", and preceded to write him up.

    30 over in a school zone? WTF was this guys thinking?

  5. #5
    Member MASTER JOURNEYMAN
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    # 12 absolute winner!!

  6. #6
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
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    Re: Cops Comments

    Quote Originally Posted by CamBirdRacing
    Quote Originally Posted by deward
    I'm an ex -cop and I once stopped a guy for 30 over in a school zone. First words out of his mouth were, "I've haven't had a ticket in over 20 years". I just looked at him and said,"Tomorrow morning you won't be able to say that sir", and preceded to write him up.

    30 over in a school zone? WTF was this guys thinking?
    X2

  7. #7
    Member JUNIOR BUILDER
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    Cops Comments

    That's exactly why he got the ticket, 30 over in a school zone. He came to court with a Lawyer that probably cost him 500 bucks, and missed a days work. He was found guilty and paid a small fine ($210). He gave me a smirk on his way out of court as if he got one over on me. Hell! I didn't pay a Lawyer to be there and I didn't lose a days work. In fact I was on O.T. to be in court.

  8. #8
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE TheYellaBrick's Avatar
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    :shock: :roll: :roll: :roll: some people's children....probably an IQ of his age minus 40....
    TRUTH is HATE
    to those who
    HATE TRUTH

    God Bless our folks in uniform
    "We the People, have your backs"
    http://www.racingjunk.com/profile/279898

  9. #9
    Senior Member SENIOR BUILDER
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    Quote Originally Posted by DirkaDirka
    I think #15, 11, & 7 or the best ones. :lol: :lol: :lol: :twisted:

    On another note....

    The wifey got pulled over one day by a state trooper and she made a comment about cops and donuts. The trooper cam eback with sorry we are not allowed to eat donuts no more. We had to change to bagels. :shock: :shock:
    LMAO, bet she didn't see that comin!
    My bro-in law is a deputy sheriff in Florida. I'm thinkin Crispy Kreme gift certificates for Christmas. Some drunk guy peed in his cruiser the other night, and they (Sheriffs Dept) told him he had to clean it up...maybe that'll cheer him up. :twisted: :lol: :twisted:
    Common sense is not that common.

  10. #10
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE THERATTLER's Avatar
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    In the 80's I was a Deputy Sheriff . I would love it when I would take a drunk in around 2 or 3 in the morning and the first thing they would say is , call the sheriff , he is a friend of mine , I would pick up the phone and dial the number for them and then hand them the phone , I could hear the sheriff cussing on the other end for waking him up ,needless to say , they all spent the night ... :lol:
    ***IN GOD WE TRUST***GOD BLESS AMERICA******


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