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Thread: Blonde vs. Lawyer

  1. #1
    Senior Member DYNO OPERATOR
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    Blonde vs. Lawyer

    A man boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box
    of frozen crabs and
    asked a blonde, female crew member to take care of the
    box for him. She took the
    box and promised to put it in the crew's
    refrigerator.

    He pointedly advised her that he was holding her
    personally responsible for
    the crabs staying frozen, mentioned that he was a
    lawyer, and proceeded to
    rant at her about what would happen if she let them
    thaw out.

    Needless to say, she was annoyed by his behavior.
    Shortly before landing in
    New York, she used the intercom to announce to the
    entire cabin, "Would the
    gentleman who gave me the crabs in New Orleans, please
    raise your hand?"

    Not one hand went up ... so she took them home and
    ate them.

    Two lessons here: 1. Men never learn. 2. Blondes
    aren't as dumb as most men think!

  2. #2
    Senior Member EXPERT BUILDER
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    Two blonde girls were working for the city public works department. One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind her and fill the hole in. They worked up one side of the street, then down the other, then moved on to the next street, working furiously all day without rest, one girl digging a hole, the other girl filling it in again.

    An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing. So he asked the hole digger, 'I'm impressed by the effort you two are putting in to your work, but I don't get it -- why do you dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?'

    The hole digger wiped her brow and sighed, 'Well, I suppose it probably looks odd because we're normally a three-person team. But today the girl who plants the trees called in sick.'
    If a 5 lb hammer can't fix it,it must be electrical
    Keep the shiney side up! 8)
    http://www.racingjunk.com/profile/85221

  3. #3
    Senior Member DYNO OPERATOR
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    An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop, and stay overnight. The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up to ask what happened to her. She answered the phone, crying, and said, "I can't get out of the room!" "You can't get out of your room?"; the captain asked. "Why not?" She replied, "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"

  4. #4
    Senior Member DYNO OPERATOR
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    A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.
    "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.

    She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV."

    "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.

    "Darn, he recognized me," she thought.

    She went for a complete disguise this time; haircut and new color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before she again approached the salesman. "I would like to buy this TV."

    "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.

    Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?"

    "Because that's a microwave," he replied.

  5. #5
    Senior Member DYNO OPERATOR
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    Q: What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
    A: A Frosted Flake

  6. #6
    Senior Member DYNO OPERATOR
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    A blonde and a both jump off a cliff at the same time. Which one will hit the bottom first?
    The brunette, because the blonde has to ask for directions.

  7. #7
    Senior Member DYNO OPERATOR
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    510
    Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
    A: Pull the pin and throw it back.


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