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Thread: How old am I?

  1. #1
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Staunton, IL
    Posts
    943

    How old am I?

    A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday.
    She spends $15,000 and feels pretty good about the results.

    On her way home, she stops at a newsstand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, 'I hope you don't mind my asking,
    but how old do you think I am?'

    'About 32,' is the reply.'
    Nope! I'm exactly 50,' the woman says happily.

    A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the ery same question. The girl replies, 'I'd guess about 29.'
    The woman replies with a big smile, 'Nope, I'm 50.'

    Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the street.
    She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question. The clerk responds, 'Oh, I'd say 30.'
    Again she proudly responds, 'I'm 50, but thank you!'

    While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.
    He replies, 'Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was.
    It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are.'

    They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the best of her.
    She finally blurts out, 'What the hell, go ahead. 'He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very
    slowly and carefully. After a couple of minutes of this, she says, 'Okay, okay....How old am I?'

    He completes one last squeeze, removes his hands, and says, 'Madam, you are 50.'

    Stunned and amazed, the woman says, 'That was incredible, how could you tell?'

    'I was behind you at McDonalds.'

  2. #2
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Independence, Missouri
    Posts
    1,188
    :lol: :lol: :lol:
    No matter where you go, there you are.
    **IN GOD WE TRUST**

  3. #3
    Senior Member RACING JUNKIE
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Montvale, VA
    Posts
    1,431
    :shock: I gotta remember that trick for when I get old and blind.HAHAHA
    "The problem with quotes on the Internet is that you cannot confirm their validity"- Abraham Lincoln

  4. #4
    Senior Member MASTER BUILDER
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Fontana, KS
    Posts
    171
    Thats a good one
    http://img89.imageshack.us/img89/7020/timnorthjrly8.gif

    "USMC-Helping The Enemy Die For Their Country Since 1775"

    "Respect Few.....Fear None......"

    "Im Strange Maybe Even Crazy But Theres Never A Dull Moment"


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